Light in the Dark

In the midst of this time of recovery from surgery, I have come to have surrender, rest, & falling into free gifts God has already laid before me. I am a doer. My boyfriend the other day asked me a question that had a piercing affect. It went straight to the root of my heart. He's good at doing that haha. He asked, "Rachel, do you love rest?" I quickly responded, "Yes, of course I love rest!!!" I was offended. Ok there it is. I was defensive. Now he was getting somewhere. As I sat, pondering why I was irritated, I then felt a tear weld up. "I love work," I said. "I love working." Now without discounting that I believe that is a gift, it is something I also have had to be tested with. In this time of TRYING TO REST, all God has been whispering is, COME. ABIDE. REST. You don't have to try, Rachel. This is really hard for me & haha I honestly want to wrestle with God about it. I have been. Constantly fighting being still. Being still isn't my strength. Being strong, haha or trying to be & going going going is. “Be still, and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10. It's a beautiful thing to see that He is with me always, is always faithful even when I'm not, & that He is my resting place. I may be broken physically right now, but as I mend, my heart has been mending as well. He knows my heart, & refines the very details, large & small in my life. What a friend I have in Jesus. 

As an athlete, it's a struggle when not having that victory hoped for, or an unexpected injury prevents you from a dream you have put blood, sweat, tears, & hopes in. If you are in that place right now of feeling defeated, I challenge you to something. I know you like challenges ;) Allow yourself to be in a restful stillness, be loved, & let God be God. I don't know about you, but difficulties, especially athletic injuries have been times that I've learned the most. He created you, knows your heart, & maybe just maybe there is purpose in revealing something even greater in your life than a physical victory. Instead of being frustrated, embrace that unknown of surrender. You might be pleasantly surprised & even thankful for this time. I know I have been. We don't just have a body. We have a mind. We have a heart. & we have a soul. Be strengthened & let that light shine in the dark. It's pretty incredible. 


The LORD is my light and my salvation;

whom shall I fear?

The LORD is the stronghold of my life;

of whom shall I be afraid? PSALM 27:1

The Lord is my light and salvation;

Whom shall I fear?

The Lord is the strength of my life;

Of whom shall I be afraid?


One thing have I desired of the Lord,

That will I seek;

That I may dwell in the house of the Lord

All the days of my life,

To behold the beauty of the Lord,

And to inquire in His temple.


Hear, O Lord, when I cry with my voice;

Have mercy also upon me, and answer me.

When thou saidst, seek ye My face;

My heart said unto Thee,

Thy face, O Lord, will I seek.


Wait on the Lord;

Be of good courage,

And He shall strengthen thine heart;

Wait, I say on the Lord.

Wait, I say on the Lord.

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